Recently, some friends have reached out to me about a Life Achievement they were about to unlock. Let’s just say I was less than supportive. I mean I did answer thier questions and gave the token “if it were me, this is what I would do” responses. But I just could not garner any excitement or connection in their unlocking this important life event.
The reason: because when I was unlocking this very same Life Achievement, they not only didn’t muster any support or empathy for me, but were about as interested in it as Dan Savage is interested in a vagina.
Let me provide some context. The Life Achievementt in question, while awesome once it is completed, can be a grueling order when you are on the front end of it. It’s usually not until you complete that you can breathe happily.
So when I was going through it, I didn’t expect my friends to have any sage advice on how to handle a situation they had never experienced before. But I did expect to have full access to there listening muscles so that I could vent about the frustrating roadblocks or rant about the archaic processes and draconian rules that the industry involved insist upon.
One of the things I bring to the table is I’m a very good listener. I seldom interrupt when someone is telling a story — unless I’ve heard if for the 586th time — but this does not come free. If I’m going to listen to your drivel and BS, I expect you to return the favor.
Same Train Line, Different Station
While you are unique, everybody goes through a lot of the same things in life. It’s often just a question of when we get there. That’s why it’s important to pay attention when our friends are going through a particular patch or life milestone. Maybe they are getting married and you …. Maybe they are buying their first home and you are still a renter. You may think that you will never buy a house yourself but I can assure you that if you don’t listen to them now, if you change your mind and decide
So the point of this post is to get it off my chest but also apologize to my friends for not being there for them in their moment of need even though it didn’t seem like they were available for me when the shoe was on the other foot.
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