Father’s Day finally has some meaning in my life

Today is Father’s Day and I get to partake in it, as much or as little as I want.  Father’s Day never really meant much to me, especially when I was a child.  My father was not a part of my life and that’s just how it was.  It wasn’t really that odd when I was kid because many of my fellow Humboldt Park delinquents friends had Absent Fathers.  It only really became a thing when I was away at college and interacted with white people from the suburbs of St Louis instead of inner city kids.

father whoI can almost understand why my dad wasn’t part of my life.  He was twenty something when I arrived on the scene and that can be a lot for a young dude to handle.  From the few times I did met him, I can tell you he was one part jerk, and two parts asshole and not a Rise-to-the-Occasion or Step-Up kind of guy.  So I’m probably better off that he wasn’t in my life.

What I don’t understand though is why his family didn’t ever reach out to me.  I have their fucking DNA in me and that has to mean something.  Maybe his parents felt they had enough legitimate grandchildren from his siblings to spend the family fortune on.  Growing up, I always assumed a half sister or brother would show up on my door step asking for a kidney.  Spoiler Alert: if that were to happen today they would be so screwed.  You had 40+ years bro.

What is really hard for me to wrap my mind around about FD is the fact that I get a lot of credit, praise and accolades from other parents.  It’s because, as my wife Nightingale points out, I do Step-Up and do the things a lot of fathers don’t, like change diapers, feed and dress my kids and interact with them.  I really don’t know what life would be like if we only had one kid but I’d like to think that I would still change a fucking diaper once and a while.  Guys seriously the learning curve on this one isn’t that high.  Your first diaper won’t be perfect but by #50 (or Day 4 as we call it) you can pretty much do it with your eyes closed.

So I’m torn.  On the one hand, I’m just doing my fucking job as a father, parent and grown up.  On the other hand, these Assclowns who don’t change diapers exist and they really need to be eliminated from the gene pool.

I think the last thing I want to say is that if you are a father and you have guy friends who aren’t, try to reach out to them and let them know that you value their friendship and Today isn’t about excluding them.  Today is about showing them what it’s like on the Other Side.

Happy Father’s Day!
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