Becoming a Parent, Parent of Twins

An Open Letter to Two Different Set of Friends

Dear Childless/Childfree Friend:

I want to hang out with you, I really do.  I miss the getting together after work and going to a social event where it was like $30 all you can drink.  While I don’t miss the chasing after skirts Playing the Field, I wouldn’t mind being your wing-man again.  Though honestly, the thought of staying out just to stay out isn’t something I can do any longer, even if I wanted to.img_2096

But in case you haven’t heard, I have children now that depend on me.  Who thought that was a good idea is beyond me but that’s how the system works.  I really want to raise them to be socially-conscious world citizens with beautiful manners and high self-esteem.  So in order to meet up with you, I need this thing called a Hall Pass.  It’s actually not hard to get, I just need minimum advanced notice.  And if we do agree to met at 6pm on Thursday and you have to cancel, just remember it isn’t easy for me to just go out the next night.

So please don’t give up on me, please keep inviting me out and bear with me while I struggle to get things into the new normal.  And if you end up on this same station later in life, I promise to be a valuable resource.



Dear Friend Whose Children are now Older:

I’m glad you are finally able to get out and do things again.  I  want to join you and hang out.  But here’s the thing.  I’m at a station in life now that you were at not too long ago in the past.  Remember all those times you couldn’t join me for an impromptu beer after work?  I realize now how much I was being squeezed in back then on weekends while you saved the mimg_2091ore precious blocks of time for your children.

We had to plan Guys Night Out six weeks in advance.  And all those 11th hour cancellations because your kid suddenly got sick.  That’s my life right now.  And I don’t think it’s asking too much for you to remember what it was like at this stage of the Child Care Train.  In fact, I need the inside scoop and you’re the one who can provide it – the good, the bad and the ugly.  There is some good, right?

So please don’t give up on me, please keep inviting me out and bear with me while I struggle to get things into the new normal.


Has the arrival of children changed the dynamic of a close friendship? Tell me about it here in the comments, then swing by my Facebook page and LIKE it! You’ll find funny, informative links and interesting pictures.  Don’t worry, your FB feed won’t get overwhelmed.

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